Faith
Faith. January 2, 2014. I almost typed 2013. It is always a bit different going into the new year. I am a bit hesitant about leaving the past and anxious about what lies ahead. For the first time, I am starting to see that it is the NOW that really matters. My attachment to the past must be held loosely in order to grab what is in the now. What I do now brings peace and hope in my mind.
You might be wondering why I put the word faith first in my very first blog post ever. In 1998, I realized that I did not really TRUST God with my whole heart. I was very angry at Him at that time in my life and didn't think He was a fair God to put me through certain challenges. It was during this time that through my yelling and screaming, surrender happened. I quit trying to control my life and everyone around me. I made a decision to trust God with my life no matter how strange or unwanted my path was to be. I decided that what I believed in my heart had to be acted upon. I could not go through my life acting like a Christian. I realized that I could not earn my way into heaven. I saw through the eyes of my heart that God was real and tangible. Jesus had been showing Himself to me since I was about 10 yrs old; I just wanted the chance to do things my way. Pregnant at age 15, single mother going to school with a job at age 19, emotional dysfunction and out-of-whack decisions in my twenties did not lead me to the place I wanted to be.
Surrendering in September of 1998 brought me to believing. Believing turned into real, living, breathing faith. The word is huge for me. This verse is my motto: "And without faith it is impossible to please God, because anyone who comes to Him must believed that He exists and that He rewards those who earnestly seek Him." (Hebrews 11:7) My new found faith led me to see the truth of my so-called worship at the time. God really wanted my heart to love Him through my music and believe that He would do the impossible if I would worship Him in an honest frame of mind.
Sooo... hopefully this gives you a glimpse of why our ministry is called Faithmusic. Telling God how great He is in song is just the warmup—the real act of worship is the unconditional surrender of the will to the purposes of God. Our prayer is that as you worship with us you will experience God in a new way. Amen.
